New York New York

New York city

I only had a short trip to New York. That was on purpose. I generally find that with new cities, if you love them, there are never enough days, and if you don't, any more than 3 or 4 is unbearable.

So what did I think of New York?

Good question. I had mixed feelings about it.

The artist in me loved the different environment. The city itself had a certain intangible vibe to it. It ebbs and flows and changes as you walk along. It pulls emotion from you in a very intense way.

Trying to connect with an art community was something I found difficult. The ones readily accessible have an almost pretentious feel. From their perspective I'm sure they deal with tons artist coming to the city to find their way and that could get tiresome after awhile. But I had trouble finding genuine people.

At the end of the day I didn't feel like I found my people there. But there was a hope that there is a community for me and given time I probably could have found it.

The tourist in me loved the fact there was so much to do. It literally is a city that never sleeps. As one who loves museums, good live music and great coffee it didn't disappoint. (although the coffee was hit or miss 😬 if it was good it was really good, if it wasn't I wept a tear for those poor beans)

Museums

Overall the museums I visited were all gorgeous. With collections that varied but were all admirable. I wasn't a fan of the layouts. I always felt like I was walking backwards or going the wrong way. Maybe I was 😂 that's quite possible.

I have to say for as long as I could remember MOMA has been on list specifically starry night. Their collection was amazing but I didn't enjoy it. 🙈

I'm not sure if it was a museum thing or a me thing. They had a collection of Henri Matisse and for me he always brings up a very somber feel. I'm not sure why? his pallets are vibrant with a beautiful flow logically I see they should cause me excitement or giddiness.

I appreciate the merits of his work but it's not something I enjoy. On the other hand I also do enjoy it because it does cause such emotion and isn't that the greatest gift a piece of art can give you. After viewing that exhibit I found myself in a very contemplative mood.

So much so when I got to the top floor to see starry night it left me wondering. Were these hordes of people here because they valued the work of van gogh or simply because this is what we've told them they should value?

The beautiful Dahl nocturnes were left for me to savor alone but yet this one painting was devoured by a hoard. It jaded my view.

And as always that contemplating turn into self contemplating. If I ever achieved a painting worth admiring would it be a meer glance by a wandering gallery goer because no one told them of the value it exudes?

It really pointed to the idea that one must be content in the making, the process, the outlet of a piece to achieve contentment.

Am I content?

No, to be honest. Right now I feel like my personal life, that I was once contented in, has shifted and I feel this trip has put it back into perspective. A part of me is wondering also if my artist thrives on the discontent. Do I keep shifting to serve the art or does the art shift my perception causing the discontent. Opening to the outside influences that are needed to create but creating discontent as a byproduct?

Is it I have realized that I'm missing things in my life I never knew I was missing?

Jackie ❤️